Being Known, Loved, Safe and Successful
Collaboration for Inclusion
Imagine if all schools were designed specifically for the students they serve. How might they be different from the way they are now? We suspect the differences might be evident beyond the confines of the classroom and extend to the way adults relate to one another as they work together. When a school is designed for its students, it creates an inclusive culture where every member of the community feels known, loved, safe, and successful.
When a team experiences synergy, it develops a collective spirit that propels the group forward. This collective spirit contributes to a sense of community, where everyone feels included and valued. Each person’s participation is necessary for the success of the whole, and they find deeper meaning in their work because of that spirit. What would it take to create and sustain such a culture? What liberatory courage would it take to dismantle existing systems that are getting in the way? It would require adaptive thinking to create what has been elusive up to this point in time.
This article will explore the importance of developing a sense of inclusion, how teams can arrive at this synergy, and why it is crucial for creating a successful school culture.
What is Inclusion?
Many of us can remember a time when we were excluded and the social pain associated with it. Our social status in the moment meant what we said, felt or thought made no difference, and might even have been a hindrance to the group. Under such difficult conditions, learning is negatively impacted. Unlike physical pain, social pain is re-lived again and again because this kind of pain preferentially engages the affective pain system (Lieberman, 2013). Rejection does not encourage contribution or thinking.
In contrast, an inclusive environment is one where everyone feels welcomed, respected and valued, regardless of differences in background or experience. Members of the community have equal access to opportunities, resources and benefits. Barriers that would have prevented people from participating fully and contributing to the work of the organization have been removed. Being inclusive means embracing diversity. seeking out differences in opinion, and recognizing the unique talents and perspectives that others bring to the table. Inclusion frees people to achieve their personal best. Being inclusive requires us to examine our own privilege and recognize how others might not have access to the same opportunities. When we are able to perceive how others don't have access, we can see how to remove barriers.
To Be Known, Loved, Safe and Successful
We define inclusion as the extent to which members of a group or community feel known, loved, safe and successful: acknowledged, cared for, secure and accomplished. These dimensions are easily recognized as esseritial to human well-being and provide the environment necessary for collaboration. They are also scalable across multiple and diverse stakeholder groups, including all members of a school community: ranging from students and teachers to non-teaching professionals and parents. When these dimensions are prioritized and integrated, they create a culture of acceptance and inclusion.
When an individual feels included, they experience these four dimensions in the following ways:
Being Known
People in the organization recognize and value me
People know who I am
I matter and feel respected - I enjoy status within the organization
Others listen to me when I speak
What I say counts - I have voice
Feeling Loved
People in the organization care about me
They are interested in my growth and development
I can be my authentic, best self
I am accepted for who I am
Others show me personal regard -1 feel appreciated and valued
Being Safe
People engage with me without judgment
I can take risks and others will not be judgmental towards me
I can make mistakes and be forgiven
I am not bullied
Others are careful and conscious of not committing micro-aggressions against me or others
Being Successful
I find meaning in the work I do
I am encouraged to be self-directed
Even as I work towards the organization’s success, I also have my own, personal goals
I have a sense of achievement about my work-I can grow and learn in this environment
My values are aligned with the values of the organization they are a good fit
Why is Inclusion Important?
By design, many, if not most, communities are homogeneous and exclusive in nature. We gather in like-groups and develop activities around our similarities. Without challenging what or how we act in life, we will not easily perceive the groups that have no access to our rituals and traditions, nor access to their own rituals and traditions. There is a paradox inherent in inclusion: in biological terms, we are wired to seek similarity. In social situations, privilege goes to those most like the group in power. Despite this, our frontal lobes contain a moral filter that seeks fairness and equity independent of similarities. This makes the road to inclusion an arduous path. To become more sensitive to the effects of privilege, we must first acknowledge its existence. Otherwise, we remain blind to its impact and may feel our success is due solely to our own merits.
Kendall’s and Ochan’s Experiences
In an illustration of white privilege, Kendall was offered the post of Science Coordinator in a district of 55,000 students, even though he was a new teacher with only 17 months of classroom teaching experience. 164 other, more experienced science teachers were bypassed. Kendall’s race, gender and physical appearance - white, male, and over six feet tall - likely played a role in his selection.
In an example of exclusion, Ochan was often the only person of color on the list of invited guests to receptions honoring incoming diplomats or noteworthy scholars in countries where the majority of the population was non-white. In these instances, she experienced being treated like wait staff when other invited guests asked her to refresh their drinks. Her exclusion, due to outward appearances, immediately placed her in the ‘outgroup’.
When people feel valued and respected, they are more likely to be engaged and motivated in their work, leading to greater innovation and creativity. However, creating an inclusive culture isn’t always easy, and requires intentional effort. Beyond examining our own biases and cultural assumptions, we need to actively seek out and value different perspectives and voices so that individuals feel safe to express themselves and their ideas without fear of discrimination or marginalization. Being deliberately inclusive is the right thing to do because it contributes to the dignity of humanity. It is challenging because it asks each of us to cross boundaries into the unknown or partially known, to bring to the table those from other cultures and traditions, and those from groups unlike our own.
How do we Become Inclusive?
In a survey, we asked stakeholders: To what extent do you feel included? To what extent do you feel known, loved, safe and successful? Before the COVID pandemic, we conducted a study on schools and organizations that had taken on training in developing collaborative skills through the Adaptive Schools framework (Garmston & Wellman, 2016). We also interviewed the authors of the original work, heads of school, a UN agency director, and other groups we had collaborated with. Survey results included administrators, teachers, non-teaching professionals, students, and parents.
We asked stakeholders to tell us what it was that contributed to their sense of membership within their organization: how did they know they were known, loved, safe, and successful in their communities? The consensus was that relationship-building is key to making everyone feel known, together with a strong focus on diversity and common core values. People also felt appreciated and heard, in a culture of collaboration, trust, and equity.
To foster a culture of inclusivity, we believe that communicative intelligence and systems are crucial. Communicative intelligence involves using skills such as empathy, active listening, and recovery to communicate effectively and authentically. Systems refer to the structures, boundaries, and practices that support relationship-building and equity. Leaders play a key role in designing these systems to ensure that everyone has a place. purpose, and freedom to be themselves. Ultimately, our goal is to create liberatory systems that promote equity and self-actualization, grounded in humanized pedagogies that recognize the importance of identity and intersectionality. By building strong relationships and fostering inclusivity through communication and systems, we can help everyone in the community feel known, loved, safe, and successful.
The following story exemplifies the importance of building strong relationships necessary to navigate adaptive challenges.
To Be or Not to Be Inclusive?
Recognizing the downward shift in student numbers after Covid, the Board of Directors of a European international school knew they had to trim the budget. They decided to cut the school’s learning support program for students with intensive learning needs, which had only been in operation for four years. When the new head of school arrived in July for the next academic year, he was greeted with letters of protest from the US Embassy, the United Nations, from many teachers and parents who felt that, while expensive, the program had captured the spirit and hearts of the community. It was now something they were proud of. On the other hand, there were also letters offering support for the decision to put a stop to the program. These stakeholders realized it was a lot of work and their own enthusiasm for it had waned: such a program would require extensive support that might not be sustainable. At this point, the new head of school realized this was an adaptive challenge facing the school there were conflicting values represented in the school and community. Part of the community valued a program designed to meet the needs of students. Another part of the community valued fiscal conservatism while also acknowledging the additional work burden some were anticipating. The head made the decision to spend the bulk of his first year studying the issue from all sides. He held focus group meetings and spoke to as many community members as possible. He built relationships to gather data and to learn what issues were at the heart of the intensive needs program. At the end of the second term, the new head had arrived at a decision. He was going to recommend to the Board to reverse their previous decision and keep the intensive needs program. He recognized the program stood for hope, symbolizing what was good about the community. It was what students in the school needed and deserved. The path was laid out.
This challenge required more than a simple technical solution of policy and implementation. The entire community would need to find common values and the inclusion of a variety of stakeholders. The head moved to develop a shared language and a place for perspectives to be heard. Using meeting protocols that ensured equity of voice and safety in the form of expression without judgment, the community could focus on students and joy in their work. The conversation had shifted. Stakeholders had unified around a common goal with common values. Creating a culture of feeling known. loved, safe and successful requires intention. It is the work of building. supporting, and developing relationships for the times when conflicts arise, as in this case. The urgency we all face in such a challenge has two facets: one facet is to recognize that, while we might be in the midst of turmoil, we need to act now because relationships are being harmed, factions are forming, the community is fracturing and students are not being served. The second facet is to develop agility: we never know when the beast of conflict will emerge, and if we have strong relationships in place in a culture of being known, loved, safe, and successful, the pathway is often easier, more respectful, and less harm is done.
How Do We DO Known, Loved, Safe and Successful?
In his 2019 book How to be an Antiracist Kendi asserts it is insufficient to be not racist, to fight racism one must work actively to be an antiracist. The insertion of the prefix ‘anti suggests that racist structures can only be dismantled through deliberate action. Similarly, Tulshyan (2022) writes that inclusion is not a passive act, and requires intentionality in our inclusion of others. It is an act of liberation. It is not sufficient merely to believe that every member should feel known, loved, safe, and successful. It requires continuous action by taking a liberatory stance that eliminates elements of systems that block inclusion.
We now offer examples from three contexts: self, teams and system. At the self or individual level, effective communication involves actively listening and using skills such as paraphrasing, pausing, assigning of attributes, and getting into rapport. While these skills sound simple, they are often challenging to implement in the moment, especially when the existing relationship is weak or damaged. Moving to the team level, the same communication skills are essential to create a safe and inclusive environment for all team members. Building relationships is critical to achieving psychological safety, particularly as we don't usually get to choose who we work with and differences and conflicts will arise in complex human systems. For many of us, building relationships is a simple task when those we work with enjoy a deep mutuality. The challenge lies in relationships that are not strong, where differences might be significant and where values clash. Adaptive inclusion involves forging relationships towards common goals in an ecology that balances the ever-present tension between collaboration and autonomy.
At the systems level, there are two areas of focus. First, it's important to examine critically the rituals and practices to determine who is and isn't included, to ensure that all voices are heard. In what ways are current systems meeting or not meeting the needs of all students in the school? Second, practices of gathering, including meetings and professional development events, can play a crucial role in building a positive and inclusive culture. Routines and practices around meetings can serve to develop a group to this end. In HeartSpace (Issa Lahera & Zoller, 2020), the authors offer a framework for organizing meetings and work time to create conditions for individual and collective growth and accomplishment. The authors further assert that 'People need each other and need to have positive relationships in order to get things done. There is not enough time to complete everything that needs to be done. Challenges arise without there being a mechanism in place to address them. HeartSpace creates a positive culture of adaptivity. Positive cultures only happen by design and these practices are the design' (pl).
Conclusion
Creating an adaptive and inclusive culture that fosters a sense of belonging and enables everyone to thrive requires personal commitment to relationship-building and a liberatory stance in systems analysis. This is a continuous process that begins with relationships, and is essential for everyone to feel known, loved, safe, and successful.
Ochan Kusuma-Powell, EdD has had a lifelong interest in developing inclusive schools and currently serves as a consultant to international schools in the areas of coaching, collaboration and inclusion.
Kendall Zoller, EdD is an author and global consultant on communication, facilitation, and leadership.
References
Garmston B & Wellman B (2016) The adaptive school: A sourcebook far developing collaborative groups (3rd ed.) Washington DC Rowman & Littlefield
Issa Lahera A & Zoller K (2020) HeartSpace: Practices and rituals to awaken, emerge, evolve, and flourish at work and in life. Burlington, ON Ward & Deed
Kendi 1 (2019) How to be an Antiracist. New York, NY: One World.
Lieberman MD (2014) Social: Why our brains are wired to connect. New York, NY: Crown
Tulshyan R (2022) Inclusion on Purpose: An intersectional approach to creating a culture of belonging at work Cambridge, MA: The MIT Press.
